Here we go again. Sadly.
I thought it was because he was on the mend. But within 3 days things were just deteriorating. The first day we figured it was because he hadn’t eaten i 5 days. But even after only 1/2 bowl of broth, he would be hurting.
Do we go. Don’t we go. I wait for him to let me know. This morning he let me know. The ambulance will only take him to the closest one. And after 15-hr wait the last time, Franklin didn’t want that as an option. He’s in pain. Hasn’t dialysized properly in days, and has fever. We call the Home Hemo clinic and speak to his amazing nurse Stella. Based on her assessment, it sounds like he has an infection. He should come down there.
My parents have taken my toddler out on their errands, so I should at least be thankful he doesn’t have to see the ambulance people and all their equipment. Everyone else is at work or school. Franklin refuses the ambulance and we call a cab. $75 for calling the ambulance. $100 for the cab (one way). Who cares about the money, but it is on the back of my mind as we reach mid-month and bills are waiting. Mat-leave money is not the lottery. I’m thankful I even get anything and be able to breastfeed my baby to give him the best healthy start.
It’s a limo taxi that comes. How rich. You take what comes out here in the sticks. I feel helpless again. In so many ways. I am exhausted with my 5am wake up as usual and should nap because I’m physically exhausted and I want to escape reality, if only for 20 minutes, but the mind won’t STFU. So, I blog. And I pray.
I pray that he is safe. He will get better. That the Lord will work through the doctors/nurses hands to ensure his life. An infection to a healthy person is a few days sick. I don’t want to think what this may result in. It can only be positive. He WILL come home. He WILL get better.
He needs to. I need him.